2008 Cadillac CTS: You Write the Caption

Mother of all crowded parking lot aids.
Optional Debutant package with "Look at ME!" accessories.
Overpasses? Garages? It can't even fit under a traffic light!

Holy smoke, did you see the size of that injun!

I don't think the "run-flats" are going to help!

Sales of the CTS are on target!

The CTS gets the shaft...and the rest of the arrow!

Don't worry, we can buff it out.

So much for the Armor All protection!

What do you mean this voids the warranty?!

CTS hit by Dadge Dart

Sorry, no coffee yet:

"CTS hit by Dodge Dart"

CTS hit by AMC Javelin

CTS hit by Pierce Arrow

The DTS comes with high visibility turn signals.

Damn, still no coffe yet:

"The CTS comes with high visibility turn signals"

CTS hit by Plymouth Arrow

CTS hit by Mitsubishi Lancer

The CTS is plagued by overzealous GPS graphics.

Just as the GPS shows, we are here.

Almost “on point”

General Motors' Last Stand

ergsum I don't think Injun is very PC. I think the Pierce-Arrow is inspired.

"Dirty Mary, Crazy Horse"

That confirms it we're here.

Say goodbye to the Caddy, and hello to the UHUAL.

Okay, who checked the box for the large hood ornament?

"Drives with Wolves"

Battle between the new and old historic markers.

"Little Big Car"

"Last of the Cadillacs"

Pointing out the sacred GM burial grounds.

"Blazing Sidewalls"

“Potential lawn art”

"Close the sunroof!"

“New GM antenna option: Nationwide AM radio coverage.”

Cadillac's Last Stand

“Similar technology”

“Checking in on GM’s stock”

“Missing the bullseye”

Cadillac's new "Dart & Science" styling is off the mark.

“Following similar pathways”

The engine was already direct injected you idiots!

The CTS is very ARROWdynamic!

That's one helluva dipstick

"Target Car was a bit off the mark"
"GM Targets potential return customers"
"Customer Loyalty program Targets GM customers"
"Arrow targets the CTS but misses the bullseye"
"GM Vehicles just as deadly in the wrong hands"
"More annual deaths by car than arrow"
"Because at GM Safety is our first priority"
"GM Cars, strong enough to take a hit!"
"GM now target of other carmakers"
"U.S. Media Targets CTS for pride and prejudice"

The natives are restless.

“A taste of government intervention”

“Taxpayer expectations”

"arrowed"

Drinking, Driving and Ginormous Archery Don't Mix

“Is it hunting season?”

“It was just a nuisance animal…..”

“You think it will make good jerky?”

GM demonstrates its groundbreaking new holographic navigation marker system.

Cadillac, aim higher!

Who let Dick Cheney play with the ginormous bow and arrow?

(poor taste?)

It's open season on Cadillacs

The Cadillac CTS, it makes other luxury sedans quiver.

“Another one bites the dust...”

GM, we missed it by... that much!

Wabbit season! Cadillac season! Wabbit season!!! I say it's Cadillac season, and I say, FIRE!

Getting right to the POINT, I won't NOCK the CTS and give it the SHAFT, in fact it is quite FLETCHING!

"Cause I'm a WILD . . . and CRAZY . . . car!"

"Cadillac CTS, now with the optional Steve Martin package."

The dings and arrows of outrageous misfortune.

@wshuff, good one!

Objects in sunroof are closer than they appear.

Cadillac almost hit the 3-Series bulls-eye.

And I thought the arrow on the GPS was annyoing.

You are here.

William Tell Overdrive

Robin Hood ornament

Cupid fast!

"Roses are red, violets are blue. This arrow is sharp, and the Caddy is, too!"

Somebody is going to get Sioux'd!

Don't worry, we can fix that with Apache.

"I tell you, man, that arrow was bigger than a Cadillac!"

"The bankruptcy judge said Cadillac wouldn't get the shaft. He lied."

"US car companies threatened by Indian competitors. Outsourcing not the cause."

"If we couldn't keep it, no one could!"

"Paul Bunyan has a crossbow?!"

"Found the cause of the wind noise."

"Where's the Lone Ranger when you need him?"

"The Lone Ranger's car of choice. For obvious reasons."

"Tontoooo! Get over here! Now!"

"Pontiac's revenge."

"Pontiac expresses how it feels about Cadillac."

"CTS = Caught The Shot"

"CADILLAC = Caught Another Driver Impudently Lobbing Large Arrows at CADILLACs"

Makes the ride too flinty, don't you think?

Another successful launch for North Korea.

And grandma sits HERE

CTS with ventilated windshield option shown.

The CTS had a bulletproof reputation; arrow proof, not so much.

Arrow down to the CTS.

I vote that this weekly segment be renamed "Ergsum writes the caption" so I don't feel inclined to actually look at the post.

Ouch!

is that a reaction to tcd223 or yet another caption??

Like trying to find an arrow in a Cadillac.

"US car companies threatened by Indian competitors. Outsourcing not the cause."

^^ best one so far, imo.

@bkochuk, I thought I would go for a twofer.

"Cadillac - Break Through"

Local arrow manufacturer mimics the Cadillac "Art and Science" theme.

"The real question is...does it return the favor?"

Featuring point-to-point navigation.

Point taken.

The CTS features pinned down ride.

"Shot through the heart, and Wayne Cherry's too blame"

Let's see....gossip magazines, dark chocolate....and gargantuan arrows....

Passenger side arrow bag deployed

The Caddy's sunroof (red) is actually a moonroof with a tilt-and-slide feature.

CTS....performance that arrowses.

Worst parking ticket ever!

"The final arrow in GM's coffin"...too soon..?

"You have arrived at your destination."

"Cli-click"

Hey, kids! We're here at waypoint #1.

"I see the compass in this car is stuck, too..."

"So that's what direct injected means"

No matter how big the space....lawn darts are just plain dangerous!!

The Caddy that forgot to zig.

I don't know why! Drive....Reverse...it just doesn't want to move!?!

Cadillac, the standard Bullseye of the world.

the word "standard" should be crossed out above

trying to hit the apple, i got a lemon.

Uh, hello OnStar?!

"Wow, an arrow just like the nav screen shows."

"Holy crap is this nav screen accurate, the arrow is right where it should be"

Find your car in the parking lot... there's an app for that!

Everyone remember where we parked.

We got stopped by security outside the Indian Casino.

Looks like Geena Davis lost an arrow again.

Objects in windshield are closer than they appear

Inside line identifies the source of the rattling... apparently we hit something.

"Find your car in the parking lot... there's an app for that!" LOL!

Oww! My Eye!

Robin Hood has his ride.

To drive this car, you have to be on the straight an arrow.

GM really stuck it to their customers with this bankruptcy thing.

CTS...Stick it to the little guy.

Cadillac, the new Pierce Arrow.

Insert navigator here (to replace flaky GPS)

"Missed it by THAT much!" - Maxwell Smart.

This will show you not to piss off OnStar operators...

I guess the North Koreans don't like Caddys either!

The North Koreans hacked OnStar the other day...

Cadillacs arrow-in hybrid

I said the CTS should have a certain SWAGGER!!

CTS, now with Bows Audio

"Hey, I found the source of the rattles!"

"OnStar tests its new Stolen Vehicle Disabling System 2.0"

Wanna get away?

Yes... GEICO... can you tell me if my comprehensive policy covers damage from giant archery implements?

Look-- this truck stop has an Indian restaurant.

"Wanna get away?" -funny!

75ft, 2.5 ton lawn darts are dangerous too.

"I don't see the point of this arrow."

"Bob loved his Cadillac, but he did think the label indicating where the dipstick was was a bit large."

The new "Dart and Science" design language.

Quick, circle the CTS Sport Wagons!

The service engine soon arrow came on.

This is not your papoose's Cadillac.

Clue: I suggest it was a San Francisco Giant, with Cupid’s Span, in the parking lot.

ARROWconditioning comes standard.

That last one was irksome, ergsum.

GM really hit their mark here. Sadly, still shot down.

Arrowneous zone climate control.

You know it is a Drug dealers Cadillac when you can see the Arrowin.

Cadillac's new sky feelers

Pontiac's spiteful parting shot strikes home.

"shot threw the heart and your to blame, you give love a bad name".

@ampim, sorry I didn't catch that you already used the "Dart & Science", my bad.

Life, Liberty, and Arrow Pursuit

Finally, that damn engine clicking finally stopped

Hey CAD, ILL ACcess the nearest repair shop.

The "New GM" Quality Test.
In an effort to rewrite history, GM takes quality testing too far.

"Quick, DODGE the arrow! Don't run off the EDGE of the road, drive SMART! Make sure you can FIT because metal can't FLEX! Damn it hit us!"

The GM gods must be crazy.

Shot through the heart, GM's to blame.
The CTS gives creases a bad name.

Now to fully "pull-out" of bankruptcy

It's litteraly injected directly

Taking direct injection too far

That last modification, really makes it stick to the road.

Now it has speedholes in the hood.

I Dare You to Return Me!!!1